I literally gasped
I want to have a marriage like this holy shit
I strongly agree and disagree with that statement to some extent.
my mom was pulling into a parking space today and she asked “am i relatively straight?” and i said “i think that’s something you need to decide for yourself” and she told me to walk home
“…opening the door the door whilst having a bread knife under your arm, wearing a ketchup smeared shirt and claiming you’d be attacked by “crack addled Oompah Loompahs”.
WOW I AM ESPECIALLY IMPRESSED WITH THE MR. FREEZE EYES
someone get this man a broom, we’ve found our seeker